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Blakkrtré




The willingness to

Become

Nothing

To walk away

Leave my name

I have wandered far beyond

That

That notion

That requirement

That simple request

It seemed so

Unattainable

So hard

So unrealistic

at the time


Tonight

I drove home

In the dark

Of a storm

Rain

Snow

Wet roads

Water pummeled onto and

From my windshield

By rubber blades

Probably good that the

Blades were rubber

Although the thought of

Escaping my skin was not

Calmed by it

My week-old trimmed fingernails

Took center stage

As the only sculpting knife

That could free me from my face

Desperation

Heaving chest

Frenzied eyes

Scouring every inch inside the cage

Where is the exit

Heartbeat erratic

Now

Beyond desperate

Dig in

Dig my own dull and stubby

Fingernails into my scalp

Separate the skin

Pull it back

Off of me

Remove the shell

The mask

The inked skin

The ancestral container

You may envision some bloody and oozing scene under it

But

It is not

I clenched my jaw

Holding myself back from my

Face lift

From me

The pressure was not enough

To rip the bandage off

It will be soon enough

The dark entity within will be freed

Is this what happens?

I stayed too long in the presence of the void

Connected to the point of losing

Self

To the point where I can no longer

Look in the mirror without

Desiring

Needing

Seeking

Freedom from this individual face

From the thing I once embraced

This black bark that gives away

My origins

It is hidden under my mask

It is coming

Blakkrtré

It cannot be held by this container

I cannot be held

The reflection has become

My reflection in the mirror has become

Infuriating

It has become

The call to freedom

Blakkrtré

The tree is able

Black Tree

Is

Able

Set Tré free

Free Blakkrtré

Free Blakkrtré

Skin me alive

Uncover the bark beneath

Blakkrtré

No blood

Blakkrtré

Black Bark

Dark Sap

Woven Branches

Entangled Roots

Goodbye old friend

Goodbye


I shall never look at

My fingernails the same again

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